


A Million Reasons

by Rodham



Category: Political RPF, Political RPF - US 21st c.
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-20
Updated: 2017-02-20
Packaged: 2018-09-25 17:00:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9831656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rodham/pseuds/Rodham
Summary: But baby, I just need one good one to stay.*Companion to Better Man, That Wasn't Me and Shake





	

**Author's Note:**

> Title and summary line are, of course, from Lady Gaga, Hillary Lindsey and Mark Ronson.
> 
> *This is purely fiction and for my own enjoyment and hopefully others' as well. It is in no way meant to be disrespectful. That being said, if you think writing it is disrespectful then reading it is as well. Glass houses, my friends. Enjoy!

Hillary sat in her office rifling through briefs that needed to be read, documents that needed to be signed and phone messages that needed to be returned not knowing where to start. It had been such a busy week and it was just the beginning of the general election going full force with Labor Day next week. The summer had gone by so quickly that she was almost caught off guard when she looked at the calendar and noticed it was August 19th, Bill’s 58th birthday. They had spent his birthday together with Chelsea, whom to this day was still not so secretly trying to get her parents back together.

Back together they weren’t but they were spending time together. It had been two years since Chelsea had blindsided both of them by leaving them alone for dinner on the first night they had seen each other since their divorce. It had been a rocky road but they were finally at a point where they were completely comfortable with one another again. But being comfortable wasn’t the problem. They both clearly still loved each other but Hillary was still not ready to put her heart out there again. While Bill would have liked more, he took what he could get from her and if being her best friend again was all he was ever going to get, he would take it.

Just thinking about Bill always made her heart flutter. She loved him more than anything, always had, but when you love someone so much they’re always the one that can hurt you the most. She looked up to the framed photo she had on her desk of their little family. Chelsea, Bill, her mother and herself. It was from Chelsea’s last birthday and Bill had taken a photo of the three women when one of his agents asked if he wanted a photo of all four of them. She ran her finger over the thin glass that encased the most treasured people in her life until the phone rang and made her jump slightly, knocking the photo off its perch.

“Shit!” she cried as she heard it crash to the floor while the phone continued to ring. “Hello?”

There was a pause on the other end of the line until a very distinguished voice said her name. There was something in that familiar voice that made her stop, made her heart skip a beat. Knowing someone for almost forty years gave you an insight into what that person was thinking just by the sound of their voice, the little inflections that no one else would pick up on. This was one of those times and she could feel the color drain from her face because she knew that something was wrong.

“What’s happened?” she asked, desperate to know why he was calling her at this late hour and why he sounded so off. It was then that she noticed it was rather loud where he was. “Where are you?”

“Well,” he started and she heard him sigh. This couldn’t be good. “I’m in the hospital.”

“What?” Hillary gasped out as she stood up and immediately started gathering her belongings.

“Hey, hey relax. It’s okay,” he tried to assure her and make her calm down before she barged into the hospital demanding to know what was going on in true Hillary Rodham Clinton fashion. Or rather Hillary Rodham, which still made him wince whenever someone said her name and forgot the third one. “Hillary,” he said again trying to get her attention which made her sit back down in her chair. She knew whatever he had to say she wasn’t going to like.

“How can you tell me to relax when you just told me you’re in the hospital? What’s wrong?” she asked and she could feel the tears already forming in her eyes but refused to let them show in her voice. She needed to be strong for him.

“Well, I haven’t been feeling well lately. A few chest pains, a little shortness of breath. I thought it was just acid reflux,” he explained. Hillary brought her hand to cover her face and didn’t try to stop the tears from falling this time. “They ran some tests and I need to have surgery. They have to wait a few days for my meds to wear off but it will be over the holiday. It’s going to be okay,” he said even though he wasn’t completely sure of that himself.

“What hospital? I’m coming to see you,” Hillary said as she stood once more and gathered her things to head towards the door.

“Darlin’, there's nothing you can do tonight but you can come tomorrow if you want. I don’t want you to go out of your way or anything,” he said softly. He still didn’t know why he called her he just knew that he needed her.

“Bill…”

“No, I’m sorry that I called you. I just needed…” he trailed off and she knew exactly what he meant.

“I’ll be there as soon as they let me in tomorrow morning. And I’ll be with you the whole time. Honey, I’m not letting you go through this alone,” she replied.

With that they said goodnight and Hillary called her agent to bring her car around. Even with the divorce, Bill had insisted on having Hillary keep a low level of secret service protection. She was grateful for them and even if she didn’t have them she would still have a driver because she would be the first to admit that she wasn’t the best driver. Once tucked into the backseat of her SUV she finally released the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. She silently stared out the window and didn’t realize that they had reached Whitehaven until she felt the car stop. When the door opened and her agent offered her a hand, she noticed there was a light on in the house. She thanked the agents and made her way through the foyer of the house into the den where the small table lamp was on and her mother was sitting with a book. Dorothy slowly closed the book and stood up knowing that the floodgates would open any minute. She was right as she saw her daughter’s eyes immediately fill with tears and start a pathway down her pale cheeks. Hillary threw her arms around her mother and cried openly like she couldn’t with anyone besides her own daughter or Bill.

“What are you doing here?” Hillary finally asked once she had settled down and they sat down on the couch.

“Chelsea called me,” Dorothy answered and Hillary nodded her head in understanding. She knew that Chelsea must have known Bill would call her and that she would need her mother to talk to. “What are you going to do?”

“I’m going to New York in the morning to be with him,” Hillary replied wondering why her mother would even question it.

“That’s not what I meant. What are you going to do afterwards? Are you two going to continue to dance around each other until one of you finally does die?”

Hillary was completely taken aback by her mother’s words. She knew that when she had decided on the divorce that her mother was a little apprehensive but supported her no matter what. Dorothy had always believed that once married, you stayed married but she understood how her daughter would feel that she couldn’t stay with a man who had hurt her so dearly. She also understood that she had never come across two people more connected on an intellectual, spiritual, emotional and physical level as her daughter and former son-in-law. She had encouraged her daughter to follow her ambition with her career but she had also encouraged her to follow her heart.

“I…”

“You… what? Hillary, I know that he hurt you, badly, but can you honestly say that you’re happier without him? Just think about it before it’s too late and you can’t do anything about it.”

And with that, Dorothy kissed her daughter on the cheek and went up to the guest room that had been deemed hers when Bill and Hillary had purchased the house before the divorce. She used it more than she had planned on shortly after the sale was finalized because the divorce had followed so quickly after and Hillary was in no shape to be alone at the time. Once she settled into her room she listened for the sounds of footsteps she knew would follow shortly. She peeked around her door when she finally heard them and wasn’t surprised at all when she watched her daughter pass her bedroom door and head to the attic. She simply smiled to herself and closed the door.

In the attic Hillary went straight for the far corner at the end opposite the stairs. It was where she kept the things that she didn’t want to look at but knew that she could never throw away. She opened one box and waved her hand in the air to clear the dust that had been rustled by her movements. Reaching inside she pulled out a framed photo. It was taken the day she and Bill had gone on their first ‘date’. After standing in line at the registrar’s office when he didn’t have to, talking his way into the closed art exhibit and strolling the museum courtyard until dark they had gone back to her dorm where her roommate was having a party. They spent most of the night feeling each other out to see if there was anything there when one of her friends walked over with a camera and caught them mid-laugh when he had finally opened up enough to tell a joke. He later told her that he was just watching how she was with others but it took a silly joke to get a laugh out of both of them that night.

She pulled out photo after photo and with each one came a story to go with it. She opened an album that was mostly full of photos from their time in California to find one of her covered in flour and the kitchen counter not looking any better. She had tried to bake a pie when Bill distracted her and they ended up knocking over her bowl and sending its ingredients all over the place. The next photo was the aforementioned pie which actually turned out very well. Pulling out another book she looked at the first page which had her sonogram from her visit where they found out they were having a girl. She had to laugh at all the photos in the book because Bill all but stalked her with a camera her whole pregnancy to take pictures of her belly. She suddenly felt the tears falling when she found a photo of Bill on his knees in front of her, holding up her shirt and placing a kiss to her rounded belly.

Looking through all of these photos brought back so many memories. So many reasons why her life was so full of love and laughter when they were young. There were many hard times but they never outweighed the good times. She couldn’t imagine her life without Bill in it in some way or another. The two years they didn’t see each other was incredibly hard and just the thought that she may lose him made her heart stop. She wasn’t sure if she would be able to survive losing him like that. He had given her so many reasons to walk away from him but he had given her more to stay.

With that in mind, Hillary pulled the photo of Bill kissing her pregnant belly out of the book and pushed the boxes away. She knew what she had to do and left the attic to pack her bags to head to New York as soon as possible. After packing she ran down the stairs to notify her agents that they were leaving very early and went back to her room to try to get some sleep.

Rest didn’t come but luckily the morning did and she made her way out the door after bidding her mother farewell with a promise she would call her when she knew anything. Somehow the press had been alerted that she was on her way so she was bombarded before entering the hospital. Once inside she made her way to Bill’s bedside and swore to anyone who was listening she wouldn’t leave.

“Hey,” he said when she entered the room. He was in a private room hooked up to all kinds of machines and seeing him like that just made her want to cry. “Come ‘ere,” he called and she was in his arms before she knew it, careful of all the wires.

“How are you feeling?” she asked once she situated herself on the side of his bed. She grabbed his hand in order to have some kind of physical connection with him and awaited his answer.

“I’m okay. Better now that you’re here,” he said with a coy smile which got him the smile from her that he was hoping for.

They spoke for awhile until the doctor came in to see how he was doing. When the doctor gave Hillary a questioning look, Bill made it clear that anything he had to say he would tell Hillary as well. Bill even reminded him that Hillary was on file as his health care proxy should it be needed, something that was news to her. The doctor went over the procedure and recovery in detail and left them to spend some time together.

“When did you make me your health care proxy?” Hillary asked once they were alone.

“I never changed it. I know I should have right after the divorce when we weren’t speaking but I trust you more than anyone. I knew that if anything happened to me you would do the right thing.”

“Okay,” she replied softly. They sat in silence for a little while until Bill noticed that Hillary’s eyes were drooping slightly from lack of sleep. He motioned for her to lie down with him and he wrapped his arms around her when she rested her head on his chest. It wasn’t long before Bill felt her breathing even out and knew that she was asleep so he closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling of having her back in his arms.

Hillary didn’t realize how tired she was until she awoke hours later when two nurses and Chelsea were already in the room. She looked at the clock and noticed that she had slept most of the day away. Bill’s arms tightened around her when she went to move so she settled back down against him, an action that Chelsea didn’t miss and chose to store that for a future conversation.

This was the way it went for several days. Hillary had sent Huma to her house to retrieve a few essentials that she would need and she never left his side. With Bill being in a private room and being a former president, he was able to have visitors whenever he wanted and the doctor noticed that his patient was more at ease with the senator there. The hospital staff had even moved a separate bed into the room for Hillary to use but it stayed untouched because every night she would settle against her ex-husband and rest her head on his chest to fall asleep to the sound of his beating heart. That was until the night before the surgery. They both lie awake staring at the ceiling just praying that everything would turn out alright and trying to not even think about any other outcome.

“Bill…”

“Yeah?”

“I want you to come home,” she said quietly. She felt him nod his head and then his body stiffened when she knew he understood what she meant.

“Are you saying…” he started and couldn't finish his sentence. He turned to face her and noticed the tears streaming from her eyes making pathways down her temples into her soft hair.

“I'm saying, I want you to come home. I'm saying I miss you and I love you and I need you to be okay,” she finally got out before a sob overtook her body. She tried to conceal it with her hand but they were too powerful so Bill gathered her body in his arms as she wept.

“Hillary…”

“No. This isn't a rash decision. I've thought about it. I don't want to live like this anymore. I don't want to wait until we don't get another chance.”

“You're sure?” Bill asked once more. He took the nod of her head as a yes and slowly moved closer to her. He asked once more with his eyes before pressing his lips softly to hers.

The kiss was so familiar yet so new. They had been apart for so long that even the most innocent of actions seemed like a huge step. They pulled apart and their eyes locked before both broke into mirroring grins. Bill brought his hand up to wipe away the remaining tears and threaded his fingers through her thick hair before claiming her lips again. This kiss was a little less innocent than the first with his tongue seeking entrance to her mouth to which she quickly complied. They were so wrapped up in each other that they didn’t notice their daughter had come to the door. Not wanting to neither disturb nor watch them, she went down to the coffee shop in the hopes that her parents would not still be ‘occupied’ when she got back.

“I’ve waited so long to kiss you again like that,” Bill said in an airy voice with his forehead pressed against Hillary’s, still trying to catch his breath.

“Me, too,” she mumbled against his cheek when she moved to place a kiss there.

“Why?” he asked.

“I’ve already told you why.”

“What changed from our phone call the other night to right now?”

“I finally realized that I can’t imagine my life without you in it. When we were apart, those two years were the hardest years of my life. Yes, we’ve had hard times before. And we’ve had really hard times before but I always knew you were there if I needed you. And I realized that with all the bad there was so much more good,” she explained. When she pulled away, Bill was worried that he had upset her until she gave him a reassuring smile and reached for her bag. She pulled the photo out and handed it to him and it was his turn to have tears in his eyes.

“Where did you find this?” he asked.

“In the attic. I still have all of it. I couldn’t throw anything away. Bill, that’s our whole life.”

“This picture. I’ve been looking for it for ages. It’s my favorite picture of the two of us. Well, three of us,” he chuckled. He remembered exactly the feel of her taut skin under his hands and lips. Any chance he had to touch her belly during her pregnancy, he took it. He looked up to see her watching him as he admired the photograph in his hands. “I love you.”

“I love you, too. This,” she pointed at the photo. “This is my reason. I just needed to be reminded.”

**Author's Note:**

> I've been working on a multi-chapter that I promise will be up soon but I'm trying to finish before posting because I'm terrible at finishing stories once I've posted a few chapters. And I'm impatient so I would like to post on a regular basis when finished. That being said, I needed a break from that one and so many asked for a follow-up to Shake. This is sort of it I think. I hope you like it.


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